=

I was having coffee somewhere today. It was a cheap majestic place introduced to me by a favorite person. The fathers and uncles and cock fighters were there talking about nothing else but politics and Mar Roxas’ trisikad ad. Duh. When alone, I love visiting corners that were introduced to me by unforgettable individuals. After that, I spent long walks trying to figure out if I need a new pair of slippers or a new gun. It has been my fantasy to be an assassin. that woman from the car window who shoots adversaries and pulls that shiny pistol from her stockings. After minutes of just roaming around, I made the best decision of buying a new floor mop. It’s the best floor mop in the world. It would definitely keep me busy when I am bored or sad or poor.

=
some weeks ago, i was in a coffee shop enjoying this great-tasting mug of frappe. i leaned my back on the wall and closed my eyes. the moment i opened them, i saw a man looking at me like he has been staring at me for the whole time. so he saw me shaking my head a bit because i loved the Sinead O’ Connor track. Admit it, sometimes, we look for romance anywhere. It’s cool. cinematic. He went out and invited me for some cigarettes. I glued my cheek on the glass so that my skin would look distorted. I shook my head seconds later. Just looking at him, I could feel that he has been working outside the country and that he wears this musky perfume. He likes to take pictures of the sunset and he likes every computer game since he was 9. The waiter gave me this cup of Espresso and told me it was from “him” but when I wanted to say thank you, all I saw was the last smoke of his Marlboro.

=
Almost a month ago, someone hugged me and the day after, I realized that I have stayed at home for a long while. lately, I have been going out and have allowed the change of weather brace the years of sacrifice I have stomached for people I love.



Oh. I have crossed out this sweet item in my bucket list.

It is too sweet that I am selfishly keeping it on my own and the other half involved.



>

some people fool themselves by surrounding them with drunken friends who would soak them in flattery/

announcing to the world the wealth that they have been too busy acquiring.

applauses.



janis joplin once said that in concerts, she made love to thousands of people

but she went home,

ALONE.





right now,

i cannot say that i am deliriously happy.

i feel sleepy today but i am not at any rate, sadder than the past few days.

sometimes, it’s all bout menstrual blues and eating ice cream the messy way.



sometimes,

it’s the thought of being kissed by your man

until your lower lip bleeds

and he walks out the door,

you pull him back too hard that it rips off his shirt

and you whisper:

“kiss me more”







how romantic



ψ